Sunday, October 28, 2012

Accept + Press On

3 days till deployment. Strengthening my heart.

Dont you hate when you learn something, weeks after it would've come in handy?

I'm a giver; God gave me the heart of a servant. That's a good thing, unless you give all you have and you find yourself empty. I guess I always thought I had enough left and I didnt bother to replenish what I had given.

A few weeks ago, I found myself almost completely empty. Not just spiritually but financially and emotionally as well. I was stressed; had a million things to do and things just werent going my way. People offered to help me, especially my ambulance crew. (They're more like friends than an crew - we meet every week for coffee and conversation). I told them what was going on, and they immediately gave me a solution. I wouldnt accept it..I actually felt that if God wanted me to do something, HE'd give me the means to do it. The thing I didnt realize is that God was giving me the means, I just wouldnt open up my eyes and lay down my pride.

Paul, my ambulance partner told me a story where I learned this..I'll make a long story short..
A guy was in a shipwrecked boat, out in the middle of the ocean. The waves were getting worse and he was out there for days, starving and tired. He was a believer, and he said that if God wanted to save him, he would. 3 planes flew over to rescue him, and he turned them away explaining to them that GOD would save him. It turns out that this man died and when he met with God, he asked him "God, why didnt you save me?"..God said to him "I sent 3 planes to rescue you and you didnt go with them".

I always wanted to help others before helping myself, but how do you help other people when you, yourself are in need. It's like a fire fighter that goes into a burning building. They arent supposed to give up their mask for a victim, because if they become the victim, they cant rescue anyone.

I learned this today when a friend of mine felt bad that a few soldiers held the door open for him at a convenience store. He thought as though he should've been the one holding the door for them. By him feeling soo badly about this, it made me think..there's nothing to feel bad about. If someone wanted to hold the door for you, its because they wanted to. Same as if someone wanted to help you, its just something that they wanted as well.

Letting someone help you, isnt showing that your weak..it's showing that you can accept God's help. God gives us gifts, signs and messages all the time but sometimes we have to step back and open up our eyes.

Do what you need to fill youself, and go on to fill someone else. When you start to feel emply, replenish. When you start feeling weak, talk. When you cant see God's help, look around you. Accept + Press on.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

All the poor + powerless

7 Days till my deployment. Preparing my Heart

Last night, while at a church bible study, I heard the song "All the poor and powerless". The song hit me hard for some reason. Obviously its deep but it really got me thinking. The chorus is, "Shout it, go on and scream it from the mountains, go on and tell it to the masses, that he is God".

Since I was little I always wanted to help people in need. I always volunteered my time and money to different organizations and activities. Of course I considered my self a good christian but I was missing something. While at church, I enjoyed being strong in my faith, but in school or work, I tended to shy away from it. If someone asked me "Are you all religious and stuff" Id say not really. Who was I kidding? I loved church, I wanted to serve God and I kept busy in church activities a few days a week. I think that pretty much makes me "religious and stuff". So why deny it? Because people would judge me? Because it isnt what everyone else is doing?

It makes me think, How can I stand up for other people, and not be able to stand up for myself? Its more than just a weakness...it's an insecurity.

The chorus of this song is a perfect example of admitting your faith. Being confident enough with youself to say that you are a christian. By making this blog, its an outward sign of my faith. I figure, if someone can only judge me because im a christian, than thats not so bad.

Check out the song on youtube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3tkUKVAlBk&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3tkUKVAlBk&feature=related

Welcome to my first blog ever!

Welcome to the famous blog of Lindsay Leigh Koch!

This will be a blog where you can follow me on my deployment to Afghanistan. For if you don't know me, I'll tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Lindsay and I'm a Military Police Soldier in the U.S. Army. I enlisted in June of 2011, left for 5 1/2 months of training in August, and returned at the end of January. It was definitely an experience.

Besides the military, there's alot more to me! I am a volunteer EMT for a local first aid squad, special needs counselor, and sunday school teacher. Im also a student at Liberty University, studying Special Education and Psychology. Eventually, I hope to become a teacher for kids with disabilities, but we'll see where God takes me. God has given me a huge heart for service.

As for my family, I have 2 older brothers, Brandon + Jordan, and parents that have always supported me. My family may not be perfect but I'm very lucky to have them. I am in a relationship with my boyfriend of almost 2 years. His name is James and he has 2 awesome kids named Jordan+Sean. They have been there for me through all my ups and downs, and always put a smile on my face.

I've always had a love for god, ever since I was little. I always wanted to know more and to learn about my faith. It hasn't always been easy though. I've struggled in keeping faith many times, but God always gets me back on track. Recently I started going to a new church with my boyfriend + kids. I had never felt so welcomed and "at home" at a church before.

My reason for making this blog is to talk about my journey while on deployment. It's hard to remember, that not only am I a soldier in the Army, but I am a soldier of God.  I know I will face many challenges while I'm away but I know that God is above all obstacles before me.

So thats me, and this is my journey with God in a combat zone!

I ask for prayer, to keep me strong in my faith and in my missions overseas.