Accept + Press On

3 days till deployment. Strengthening my heart.

Dont you hate when you learn something, weeks after it would've come in handy?

I'm a giver; God gave me the heart of a servant. That's a good thing, unless you give all you have and you find yourself empty. I guess I always thought I had enough left and I didnt bother to replenish what I had given.

A few weeks ago, I found myself almost completely empty. Not just spiritually but financially and emotionally as well. I was stressed; had a million things to do and things just werent going my way. People offered to help me, especially my ambulance crew. (They're more like friends than an crew - we meet every week for coffee and conversation). I told them what was going on, and they immediately gave me a solution. I wouldnt accept it..I actually felt that if God wanted me to do something, HE'd give me the means to do it. The thing I didnt realize is that God was giving me the means, I just wouldnt open up my eyes and lay down my pride.

Paul, my ambulance partner told me a story where I learned this..I'll make a long story short..
A guy was in a shipwrecked boat, out in the middle of the ocean. The waves were getting worse and he was out there for days, starving and tired. He was a believer, and he said that if God wanted to save him, he would. 3 planes flew over to rescue him, and he turned them away explaining to them that GOD would save him. It turns out that this man died and when he met with God, he asked him "God, why didnt you save me?"..God said to him "I sent 3 planes to rescue you and you didnt go with them".

I always wanted to help others before helping myself, but how do you help other people when you, yourself are in need. It's like a fire fighter that goes into a burning building. They arent supposed to give up their mask for a victim, because if they become the victim, they cant rescue anyone.

I learned this today when a friend of mine felt bad that a few soldiers held the door open for him at a convenience store. He thought as though he should've been the one holding the door for them. By him feeling soo badly about this, it made me think..there's nothing to feel bad about. If someone wanted to hold the door for you, its because they wanted to. Same as if someone wanted to help you, its just something that they wanted as well.

Letting someone help you, isnt showing that your weak..it's showing that you can accept God's help. God gives us gifts, signs and messages all the time but sometimes we have to step back and open up our eyes.

Do what you need to fill youself, and go on to fill someone else. When you start to feel emply, replenish. When you start feeling weak, talk. When you cant see God's help, look around you. Accept + Press on.